at the starting gate ...

ummm ... in case you didn't get the memo, summer is over. yep! shorstack is heading back to school tomorrow, panda begins her crazy fall rush tomorrow and i ... well, i am still in the midst of my summer-fall-where-was-the-vacation insanity.

the house is quite quiet right now. panda's resting and hoping her body will get rid of the sore-throat bug before her fall-semester-student-meetings, shortstack is chillin' and playing til mama is ready to hit the park, and here i am ... after a quick AM farmer's market jaunt ... ready for a nap.

summer wasn't slow for us this year. i had hopes ... but, well, it just didn't happen. i had dreams of cleaning and scrubbing out the fridge, reorganizing closets, replanting an herb garden, lazy picnics on long afternoons ... it just didn't happen. but it was a GOOD summer. knee surgeries and healing, wedding planning, visits with ohana, and progress on my thesis. i guess we can't complain. but that doesn't mean i'm ready for the fall craziness!

anyhow ... here's to hoping that all of you are enjoying your sunday AM rituals ... have a spectacular day!!

these guys got it right ... find your bliss on this beautiful sunday AM! =)

finding my zen place

sometimes, when you are having one of THOSE days, you need to be able to find a place of peace ...

... and here it is ... 

... peace in my family and to all of yours ...

An APLS Wedding in Paradise

hey all ... i know ... it's been awhile ... story of my life! anyhow ... i finally got our website up for the wedding:
apls-weddinginparadise.blogspot.com

enjoy!

am i just fizzing out??

over the past two years, i've had this bossy, pushy, demanding internal voice nudging (sometimes shoving) me to figure out what my purpose(s) and passion(s) in life are. i mean, beyond the obvious (my cozy ohana and our home, coffee, chocolate, tons of books, browsing blogs, collecting stuff ...) i guess, what is it that i am on this planet of ours for??

i spend time every morning browsing through the blogs of other people who are inspiration to me because they seem to have it all figured out! they somehow have found out what their calling is - so they can shut up the pushy, demanding voices that are shoving them through self-excavation and they can focus on DOING. i want to be there!! but i'm not ... at least not yet. so, every time that bossy internal voice starts getting on my nerves (it happens quite often!) i dig a little more ... or i retreat into my internal mind bed cave ... and look for help, inspiration, revelations, anything that will help me figure it out. but, if i'm too tired, stressed, lazy, bored or intimidated ... well, then i just take a look at my family and realize that although i don't necessarily know what my calling is quite yet, i am a lucky, LUCKY woman to have been charged with loving and caring for my family ... do i really need to know more than that at this very moment ... nope. not really. the adventure of self-excavation will probably always continue, but for now, i'm looking forward to heading home during my lunch to care for my wife and put together another little care package for our shortstack.

my number one purpose: to love and be loved by my family!

here's to wishing you purpose and passion in your lives!!

thursday's bit of life ...

i woke up with a KILLER migraine this morning. to be honest, i knew it was coming while i was sleeping last night. for some reason, i could feel it snaking its way up my spine and into my neck and the back of my skull while i was trying desperately to stay in dreamland. when i finally convinced myself to attempt to open my eyes, and only one eye made it open, i knew it would be a stay-home day for me. in the meantime, my stubborn wife who is sofa-bed-bound for at least the rest of the week got her stubborn a$$ out of bed to hunt down my imitrex (seriously! better living through pharmaceutics!! that's the lesson i learned while working at pharmacy schools =) and nagging me to go back to sleep until the drugs kicked in. after calling in sick, a bit more sleep, a shot of caffeine, a hot shower and some granola with coconut milk (i seriously need to hit up THAT convo with y'all soon!) i was feeling more human and more able to spend some time working on my too-much-untouched thesis. after about an hour of being in my head and my journal articles, i looked up for more coffee and realized that the kitchen table had become overwhelmed with my mess. oh well! so, since this is where i am now, i'd thought i'd share a shot of my life right now ...

you can see panda's foot propped up in the background ... poor woman. we're soon headed out to take her to her 1st PT (physio for you aussies) session. which, to be honest, i don't get what they're going to do with her considering that she has 18 STAPLES in her leg. but, i guess that's why i'm not a PT.

and so our day continues on, i'm sitting with my coffee, books, articles and laptop (yes, i was taking a mind break and browsing through my favorite blogs!) all the while, hoping that the migraine will soon leave me alone. even if it doesn't, our bits of life are completely blissful.

here's to hoping that life is treating you to blissful bits as well!

healing at home and comfort food

it's been an eventful week. besides an avalanche of "to-do" items at work and a never-ending laundry list of "get-done-now-or-never-get-done" items at home, panda underwent a major surgery last thursday to minimize the knee pain that she has been feeling for years. i have to back this story up a bit so that you can grasp the big-picture ... panda had 9 surgeries on her right knee up until this point. it started in her late teens with a soccer-induced knee injury (yep! healthy sports, huh??) and over the years, she's gone in fairly regularly to have work done on her knee so that she could keep ... well, walking, driving, moving ... you know, those daily functions that our knees help us accomplish. on her latest visit to her doc, there came a crystalline moment in which they agreed that these surgical "clean outs" just weren't cutting it (pun not intended) anymore and a more drastic measure needed to be taken. enter the idea of an osteotomy. to spare you the gross details, basically it is meant to help realign the knee allowing for less pressure in the most damaged knee area; it involves cutting a wedge of bone out of her femur and putting in some plates, screws ... you know, things that you find in a hardware store. so ~ after 3 hours of waiting, 4 hours of surgery, 18 staples in the incision, 2 nights in the hospital and a good number of doses of wonderful IV painkillers, panda finally made it home and is not installed on our comfy pull-out bed in the living room for a 1 -2 weeks of rest and recovery to be followed by 6 - 8 weeks of crutches and healing along with a unspecified amount of time of PT. ahhhh ... deep breath in and out ...

thankfully, my honey is home! safe, sound and sore ... but home. to say that we were both exhausted and emotionally wrung out upon our return to our cozy haven is an understatement. we both NEEDED to just curl up into balls on our respective couches (no more snuggling in for me --- after all, i AM a klutz!), zone out and take a few deep breaths knowing that we were home. it was time to find some comfort and get ready for the recovery and healing stages - neither of which are painless).

knowing that we would be home-bound for a while (no complaints on my part!), i had a fairly well-stocked fridge and pantry. it was time to dig in and make some yummy comfort food to nourish our bodies and our tired souls. now, if you know me, you probably know that recipes are suggestions to me (kind of like speed limits and traffic signs). i take the gist of the recipe and then do with it what i wish. we had a HUGE bag of broccoli sitting in our fridge, so i started on a search for a good & quick broccoli soup recipe ... and here's what i ended up creating:

Quick & YUMMY Soul-Soothing Broccoli Soup

~ one medium onion, chopped

~ one handful garlic cloves, peeled and chopped

~ generous touch of olive oil & one pat of butter

~ broccoli florets (as much as you like - i used approximately 3 heads of florets)

~ chicken or veggie stock

~ spices as you desire (i used tumeric, paprika, oregano, cumin, s&p, chopped ginger)

~ sour cream, yogurt or some other dairy product to make it creamy

1) saute onion and garlic in olive oil & butter til translucent or carmelized (as you like it)

2) add in desired spices and cook to toast spices and develop flavor

3) add in 1 box chicken or veggie stock (approximately 4 - 6 cups. depends on the soup consistency you like)

4) add in broccoli and let simmer for 6 - 8 minutes until cooked through

5) take pot off heat and blend (i used immersion blender, but you can use traditional blender but i suggest you blend in batches to minimize mess)

5) when you reach desired consistency, taste and adjust spices as needed. if too runny, put pot back on heat and simmer to thicken

6) take pot off heat when reached desired consistency and add in sour cream or yogurt. let soup rest a few minutes so that everything melds together

i've got to tell you ... that was some YUMMY soup! a couple of days later, I used it as the base for a pasta casserole that i made with leftover kalua beef, corn, beans and cheese.

as tired as i've been ~ partially because i don't sleep well when my family isn't at home, partially because there's a part of me that stays alert listening out for panda since she's still feeling some crazy pain and discomfort, partially because, well, i'm a bit stressed ~ it is comforting to retreat to my kitchen and make food with love. there's a soothing rhythm that i fall into as i chop, season, stir and ponder in front of my stove. and so as the healing continues so will the food creations.

we're wishing you all comfort and love in your homes ...

checking in ...

arghhh!!! life goes TOO quickly ... the days are zooming by and keeping up with them is never easy. but i wanted to check in ... just because. i know that few people read my random thoughts here, but there's something about putting my words, thoughts, ideas out into the universe that grounds me and makes me feel connected to the "big whole". i'm still trying to figure out what the "big whole" is ... but, for my purposes right here, right now, it works.

panda is going in for a major surgery on thursday. i'm getting nervous and jittery which makes me pushy and bitchy and a bit distant. shortstack comes home in 3 weeks, which makes me anxious and even more jittery ... not quite a state that i would suggest for anyone ~ especially myself. and so, this afternoon i'm off to a massage ... self-care! well, that's what i tell myself. more likely, a self-indulgence.

i hope that this post finds you all in a smooth-sailing state of mind and maybe you can send some of those smooth-sailing vibes my way ... seems like i can use 'em right about now!